Friday, April 04, 2008

My Best Possible Selves (Meme):

The rules of this meme, which I got from Sonja Lyubomirsky, are to spend 15-20 minutes imagining how you would like to be in 5 or ten years.  What would you like your life to be like?  If all your wishes could come true and you could be the best you could be, live where you want to live, have what you want to have, do what you want to do, what would that look like?  I am not tagging anyone for this meme, but if you are reading this and want to play along, let me know (in a comment with a link to your meme post.

 

I did this before (a few years ago), and pictured myself living on the back side of a mountain (where I couldn't see the main road but it was nearby) in Colorado (or some other western state, or somewhere in Europe) with a man I loved and a view of the mountains and the valley and wildlife.  I pictured myself writing novels and poetry, and participating in some civic events such as poets in the school and/or environmental work.  I don't remember when exactly I wrote this, but I didn't have a man and now I do, and I am writing novels and poetry, but the place I live in is flat as a pancake and way too citified for my tastes.

 

So let me begin anew:

 

Where:

 

In five or ten years, I would like to be living on the back side of a mountain or in some other nice place with a view of mountains and or a lake or the ocean or a lovely cottage garden (or some other attractive wild or pastoral view), not too far from civilization, with easy access to amenities, hospitals, doctors (I'm getting older now, so I can't help but think about stuff like that which I never worried about when I was younger).  (I would at least like to be OUT of the city, much closer to real nature and real wilds than I am now.)  I guess I am listing this first because I really dislike where I live now.  It's the one thing that has gone downhill in my life.  I used to have lots of access to nature and wilds.

 

With whom:

 

I would like to keep the man I have now (YAY BB!), and to improve and deepen our relationship.  I would like to have several dear close friends in addition to BB, whom I hope will still be a dear close friend and lover.  I would like to be in close contact with my children and grandchildren and have a good community, lots of casual friends (but not too many) and a social support system and exchange.  I would like to balance family, friends and time alone.  Balance social time, family time and work time.

 

Work and play:

 

I would like to be writing novels and poetry and publishing them successfully, painting, walking and taking pictures, camping and spending time in nature, and I would like to participate in some form of giving back to the world, socially, environmentally.  I would like to live as greenly as reasonably possible.

 

Best possible selves:

 

I would like to be LEAN, healthy and appropriately safe, active, enthusiastic, energetic, cheerful, happy, serene, joyous, loving, appropriately generous, engaged, curious, interested, giving, and good.  I would like to live an honorable life, do the right thing(s), not be grumpy, cranky, defensive, paranoid, or overly reactive.

 

I would like to see a therapist and work out (or work on) some of my issues.

 

OK, I am posting this, but I may come back to it.  Let me know if you do one.

5 comments:

bluerose9062 said...

I really don't know the answers to those questions. Haven't known since my husband died. I just know that I don't want to be where I'm at. Funny you mention therapy. That's what I'm working on right now. I'll have to come back to this meme at another time.

It sounds like you're pretty close to having all your wishes. Family, friends, working on your creative endeavors. Just need to work on location and some personal issues. But then, don't we all.

I do know that if I could live anywhere, it would be tropical with beaches and blue water, not traffic and muddy water.

I hope all your wishes come true for you in the next 5 or 10 years.

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

Thanks so much, Blue Rose! :-D

Having a husband die is a pretty traumatic thing and takes a really long time to recover from and rediscover yourself.

Did you ever read The Year of Pleasures? It's a little unrealistic, I think, but a good read anyway.

bluerose9062 said...

I'll have to check it out. Who's it by?

bluerose9062 said...

Hi Mary. I've come back here several times. I've been working on another challenge, where I needed to define my goals, so I've decided to combine the two. I cheated, though. I spent a lot longer than 20 minutes on it.

I also checked out the link in this post, and I'm trying the gratitude journal idea. Thanks for posting this.

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

Yr welcome. Did you see that for most people, it works best to do it just once a week--I was doing it every day.

I have her book. Sonja's, I mean.

The year of Pleasures is by Elizabeth Berg.