Monday, August 19, 1968
Look in the mirror, Mary. What do you see?
A girl, in her early twenties, slightly overweight but not unattractive, tanned [but not tan enough], dressed in matching orange underwear covered by a ripped blue workshirt with a kief smoker on the back. Hair in braids, dark eyes, flushed skin from dancing.
What about the face?
The face, sometimes almost lovely, sometimes ugly. One eye Hindu Indian, one eye Italian. [I like the Indian eye better]. Mouth slightly crooked, a slightly bitter twist, but soft. Sometimes proud and defiant. Sometimes sulky.
Bitter. I don't want to be bitter. Proud-looking maybe, but please, not bitter.
I don't want to be fat. I would like to be slim, large, raw-boned, stark, not fat, flabby, wrinkly and bitter. Please. Not fat!